Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Attention SF drunktards: An 80-proof shot is not good for your stomach, energy, emotions, walking or hangover!

Listen, new-money Web 2.0 Yelper yuppie dude, with your $15 fresh-fruit cocktails and your single-malt snobbery, throwing your Google stock option money across bars all over town: Jordan Mackay at 7X7 magazine has a message for you.

He knows you've read all about Italian bitters like Fernet Banca on the Web and maybe in a newspaper you accidentally read once, on a train or something.

It's cute you order a round of "amari" after dinner (small plates, probably), and before leaving the first bar, and before stumbling home.

But stop hoping it will brighten your mood, or give you energy, or digest your food, or make the evil hangover go away. Unlike your useless herbal supplements, which merely waste money, bitters contain alcohol and drinking more than one "is like taking the carpool lane to the Big Hurt," no matter what they tell you at R Bar.

Which, by the way, is kind of a retarded, Web 2.0 name for a bar, and needs an apostrophe. (OK, maybe Jordan didn't say that part.)

7X7: The Day After Amaro

(Photos courtesy thepartycow on Flickr and Adam j r on Flickr.)

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2 Comments:

Amy Sherman said...

You crack me up! I'm going to start using the term yuppie yelper dude from now on.

When I lived in Italy I drank "digestivo's" as we called them. After a gut-busting meal just a shot of Averna or Cynar would make you feel human again. It didn't really help you digest anything but the burn of the alcohol makes you feel much better for some odd reason.

July 19, 2007 7:43 AM  
Ryan said...

I have to admit that the idea of a disestive has always intrigued me. I usually opt for espresso over liquor though. I can definitely see the appeal of having some alcohol in there. In Spain they do, I think, whisky (or rum?) and espresso, that sounds like a nice combo!

July 19, 2007 11:52 AM  

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